What Do You Bring to the Room?

We spend a lot of time thinking about what we're going to get from a networking event. Will I meet potential clients? Will someone introduce me to the right person? Will I find a collaboration partner? Will this be worth the time away from my business?

Those aren't unreasonable questions. We're business owners, and time matters. If we're going to put something on our calendars, we want it to be valuable.

I've started thinking there's another question that matters just as much: What will the room be like because I was in it?

That's a very different way to walk into a networking event.

Instead of immediately scanning the room for the people I need to meet, I start paying attention to the people God has placed in front of me. Instead of wondering whether a conversation is going anywhere, I can actually be in the conversation. Instead of measuring the meeting by how many opportunities I leave with, I can think about whether I contributed something valuable while I was there.

That doesn't mean I stop talking about my business. I'm there to build business relationships, and I want people to know what I do. It doesn't mean I never ask for an introduction or pursue an opportunity. There is absolutely a time to do those things.

It simply means I don't have to make myself the center of every conversation.

People Remember How You Show Up

Think about the people you enjoy seeing at business events. I would guess it has very little to do with how polished their elevator pitch is. Think about it - Am I right?

There are people who change the energy of a room simply by walking into it. They're interested in other people. They remember your name. They ask about the thing you mentioned the last time you saw them. They introduce two people because they genuinely think they should know one another. They celebrate someone else's good news without immediately finding a way to redirect the conversation back to themselves.

You feel better after talking to them.

Then there are people who have a very different effect on a room. You know within thirty seconds that they're waiting for you to stop talking so they can tell you what they do. Every conversation somehow circles back to their business. You start looking over their shoulder for an escape route before they've even finished their sentence.

We've all met both. (If we're being truthful, we've probably been both at different points in our lives.)

That's worth paying attention to in others and in ourselves. When we're building business relationships, we're not simply communicating information about what we sell. We're giving people an experience of who we are.

Tabitha Was Known for What She Gave

There's a woman in Acts 9 who doesn't get nearly as much attention as some of the other people in Scripture, but I think she has something beautiful to teach us about influence. Her name was Tabitha, also called Dorcas.

Acts tells us she was "always doing good and helping the poor." When she died, the widows gathered around Peter crying and showing him the clothing she had made for them.

Think about that scene. These women weren't standing there listing Tabitha's accomplishments. They were holding evidence of the way she had cared for them. Her life had left something behind in other people's hands.

We know very little about Tabitha compared with people like Paul, Peter, or David. We don't know whether she had a title. We don't know whether she was considered influential by the standards of her culture. We do know how people felt about her when she was gone.

She had served them. She had mattered to them. Her influence was visible in what she had given. That makes me think about the kind of reputation I want to build. If my name comes up when I'm not in the room, I hope people don't only remember what I sell. I hope they remember how I showed up.

Generosity Is Bigger Than Money

When we hear the word generosity, we tend to think about giving financially. That's certainly part of it, but business gives us so many other things we can be generous with. We can be generous with encouragement. We can be generous with introductions. We can be generous with attention. We can celebrate another person's success. We can share an opportunity that isn't right for us. We can speak someone's name in a room she isn't in.

Sometimes the most generous thing you can give someone is your full attention for five minutes. Let's be honest - That's becoming increasingly rare.

Philippians 2:4 tells us not to look only to our own interests, but also to the interests of others. I think that's incredibly practical for Christian women in business. We can absolutely care about our own businesses while remaining genuinely interested in what God is doing through someone else's.

Those things aren't in conflict. In fact, I think that's one of the ways our faith should make our business relationships look different.

You Don't Need to Prove Your Value in Every Conversation

There's something that happens when we walk into a business room feeling like we have to prove ourselves.

We talk too much. We over-explain what we do. We squeeze accomplishments into conversations where they don't belong. We worry that if we don't mention the right thing, people won't understand how successful or experienced we are.

I know I've done it. Most of us probably have.

When you know who you are and you're confident in the value you bring, you don't have to spend every conversation proving it. You can listen. ask a question and actually care about the answer. You can let someone else have the spotlight. You can walk away from a conversation without ever getting to tell her about the thing you hoped you'd mention and trust that there will be another opportunity if there needs to be one.

There's an understated confidence in that. I don't know about you, but I want to be that confident.

Romans 12:10 tells us to "honor one another above yourselves." That doesn't require shrinking ourselves or pretending we have nothing valuable to contribute. It simply means we don't need to diminish someone else in order to establish our own importance.

The Best Networkers Often Don't Look Like They're Networking

Some of the best-connected people I know aren't the people working the room the hardest. They're the people everyone is genuinely happy to see.

That's different.

They've built a reputation over time for being someone worth knowing. They show up. They care about people. They contribute. They're generous with relationships without treating relationships carelessly. When they need something, people want to help them because there's a relationship there.

That's why I keep coming back to stewardship when I think about business relationships. Every introduction doesn't need to become a client, referral partner, collaboration, or coffee meeting. I can steward the conversation I've been given. I can treat the person in front of me as someone worth knowing before I know what she might be able to do for me.

That's a very different way to network.

What Would Happen If Everyone Came to Give?

This is something I think about with The Leaders’ Table. What happens when a room full of women walks in asking, "What can I contribute here?" instead of "What am I going to get from this?"

The entire room changes.

One woman has experience another woman needs. Someone knows the person another woman has been trying to meet. One woman has walked through the exact challenge someone else is facing. Someone needs encouragement that day, and the woman sitting beside her happens to have the right words.

Nobody had to manufacture it. They simply had to show up willing to contribute. That's the kind of networking culture we have in our community.

Of course I want business to happen around our Tables. I love hearing that women have hired each other, referred each other, collaborated, and created opportunities together.

But at the same time I don't want that to happen because everyone walked in asking, "What can these women do for me?"

I want it to happen because relationships were built first.

Leadership Reflection

Before your next networking event, don't only think about what you're hoping to accomplish while you're there. Ask yourself one more question: What will I bring to the room?

Maybe you bring encouragement. Maybe you have a relationship that could help someone. Maybe you bring years of experience and can offer perspective when someone asks for it. Maybe you're the woman who notices the person standing by herself and invites her into the conversation.

You don't have to arrive with a grand plan for serving everyone in the room. In fact, I'd rather you didn't turn generosity into another networking strategy.

Just pay attention. Who is God putting in front of you? Then steward that conversation well.

Leading Well

Leadership isn't only demonstrated when we're standing at the front of the room. It's demonstrated in how we enter the room in the first place.

Do we need to be noticed, or are we willing to notice someone else? Do we need every conversation to benefit us, or can we contribute without keeping score? Can we celebrate another woman's opportunity without immediately wondering where ours is?

Tabitha's story reminds me that influence isn't always measured by how many people know our name. Sometimes it's measured by what remains in people's hands and hearts because we were there.

I want to be that kind of woman in business. I want to build something successful, absolutely. I also want the rooms I'm in to be better because I showed up. I want people to feel seen, encouraged, connected, and valued. That's influence worth having.

That's part of leading well.

Pull Up a Chair

If you're a Christian woman in business in North Houston looking for a room where women want to know more than what you sell, I'd love for you to experience The Leaders’ Table.

We're building genuine relationships, talking about real business, encouraging one another, and creating a community where women contribute to the Table rather than simply take from it.

More Than Networking. A Place to Be Sharpened.

Come as our guest and pull up a chair.

Frequently Asked Questions

How can I add value at a networking event without being salesy?

Adding value doesn't have to mean giving away your services or arriving with something to offer everyone. It can be as simple as listening well, showing genuine interest, encouraging someone, making an appropriate introduction, or contributing thoughtfully to a conversation.

What does the Bible say about building business relationships?

The Bible doesn't give us a modern networking formula, but it has a great deal to say about how we treat people. Scripture teaches Christians to serve others, practice generosity, show hospitality, honor one another, listen, encourage, and consider the interests of others alongside our own.

Should networking be about giving instead of getting?

Healthy networking doesn't have to be one or the other. Business owners can pursue legitimate business opportunities while also caring about the people they meet. The problem comes when we view every person primarily according to what she might be able to give us.

How can Christian women network differently?

Christian women can approach networking from a place of stewardship rather than transaction. That means seeing people as valuable before knowing what they can do for our businesses, leading with integrity, being generous with encouragement and relationships, and allowing faith to influence how we treat people in business settings.

Related Scripture

Acts 9:36–42 — Tabitha (Dorcas) was known for doing good and helping those in need; the people around her could point to tangible evidence of how she had served them.

Philippians 2:3–4 — Looking not only to our own interests but also to the interests of others.

Romans 12:10 — Being devoted to one another and honoring others.

Galatians 5:13 — Serving one another humbly in love.

Proverbs 11:25 — A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.

1 Peter 4:10 — Using the gifts we've received to serve others as faithful stewards of God's grace.

Luke 6:31 — Treating others as we would want to be treated.